Can broken be used?

Do you feel like your pain is so deep,for so long it can never be fixed?Do you wish you never had the cracks in your life showing your hurts? There is a reason for every thing Ecclesiastes 3.There is a time for every thing.

This week is hard for me, maybe it is the fact that over 30 years ago my mother died of cancer.Or a year ago my best fur friend Winston my old English sheepdog ,that walked with me through everything for 15 years is now gone .Or maybe it is that 7 years ago I sold a blessed company God gave me, and I sold it on the same day as my other 2 events .

Do you ever feel broken? Have you ever  felt a crack in you that is leaking and something is coming you out ? Do you wonder, will you ever make a difference?May I  I remind you ,a reason for everything I am not qualified to  produced a prosperous. company I am not qualified to write.  I a not qualified to do much as when life looks at broken ,we place it aside.


BROKENNESS:  comes in many ways,Having been fractured or damaged and no longer in one piece or in working order.

You can find a way to have the brokenness work . Allow Jesus to heal ,and restore you .Gather all the broken pieces into the original container ,crush the whole part of the hurt,(even the parts that may not be broken).

Allow the broken pieces to create a new !


Take your brokenness and lift it to God , He creates ALL things New !  Isaiah 43:18 ,19 Remember not the former things,nor consider the things of old.Behold I am doing a new thing,now it spring forth,do you not perceive  it?I will make a way in the wilderness and rivers in the desert.

Broken  making a way !





Beloved, if God so loved us, we also ought to love one another. No one has seen God at any time. If we love one another, God abides in us, and His love has been perfected in us.
I John 4:11‭-‬12

Love is more than simply warm feelings;it is an attitude that reveals itself in action.How can we love others as Jesus loves us? By helping when it’s not convenient, by giving when it hurts, by devoting energy to others welfare rather  than our own, by absorbing hurts from others without complaining or fighting back.

I can tell you from a place of much darkness, pain , rejection,and  abandonment , it is one of the HARDEST  things I have had to learn ! You may be saying you didn’t have to learn it. For me I did. You see I  decided at the very young age of 4, when I looked around me at the adults and saw all the abuse and pain. I  recall saying to myself , I’m not going to be like them. No the pain and abuse didn’t stop until many decades later.Yet it did and I have been able to allow Jesus my VERY BEST REAL FRIEND ,to teach my what true love is !!

You see we all have choices, and free will. Many of us have been and will be hurt in life. It’s our choice to allow ourselves to be who Christ has created us to be in this life . I may not have the education , the gifts and talents many of you have. And yet  through this process of my destiny walk I have released the anger, pain ,the  disappoints. and I have decided I DON’T want to be like anyone else !! I AM UNIQUE. Not for any other reason , except GOD’S LOVE.He  held me through every storm, every fire, all the rejection . Am I healed?Yes. I still get hurt, I still feel the pain from family and friends . I hurt where I see others going through  hard times .

I have been told I have a right to not forgive them .That they don’t deserve to be forgiven, for the life they took from me .That they need to suffer as I have had to . Yet as that innocent child I know It was all wrong. I  determined and even spoke out loud. I will never be like you ! And as I am here today with a life that has went through many fires, I KNOW LOVE !!

Love is  the flame that keeps life alive !!

To my 6 children;You are my love,I respect you …

To my husband !! My knight; You captured my heart , the moment I saw your eyes! My heart melted.  For the FIRST time EVER I felt butterflies inside of me !!!!You are  the man who has only shown me true kindness ,giving me of his complete love . We are designed to show GOD’S GREAT LOVE !

If YOU take the first step to Jesus, I promise He will hold you , heal you , help you and NEVER let you go !!


Love is patient,

Love is kind

Love is does not envy,does not boast,it is not proud.


it is not-self seeking,it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs.

Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the TRUTH, Always  protects,always trusts always hopes always perseveres.

LOVE NEVER FAILS         1 Corinthians 13:4,8

If this can help just one person, than you are the one that I went through the journey I did.You are worth it, YOU  matter.I CARE, please feel to share or email me ❤

Communicating with Integrity

Respectfully,Special k

I not seeking people to follow me .. I WANT with all my life to follow Christ!!I desire that I lead people to Jesus ..ONLY HIM      Thank you all.








This week has been a week of questions and tests from friends that were seeking help, directions, answers, and others just needed a friend to listen. I have caught myself in the net of my own words. Let me explain. I have been taking the time to look at the awesome powerful things God has done through and for me. I shake in my bones at times. He has never failed me,or rejected me. I of course seem to do it more than I can count and I don’t like that in me. I want my Daddy to be proud of my choices. I have looked waited and watched for the man called Daddy to come to me and say yes Karen , “I CARE FOR YOU” The many several times God has sat beside me and I wouldn’t even give Him a moment of my time.Those were my moments of not taking what was mine. It had my name on it, Jesus handed it to me.The fears that I walked through, (and still do) are certainly real. And the hurt I caused because I didn’t want to receive or believe! Looking back and even today I see the hope and help that is handed out daily, moment by moment to me by God and I question debate, even ignore the true wisdom that is mine just outside my door .. That door ( is my heart) in my life. I have learned how to hide from people, police and danger. There was a season in my life I did modeling. I was to model clothes as a mannequin As I stood very still not making any movement I could see yet never receive just stand and look.(While I was sharing my nugget of Karen’s world.) I gave this story. If I had a check and I made it for 10 million dollars, signed it and handed it to you. But if you never reached out and took it, placing it in safe place it would never do you any good. God has everything we need and He stands beside us holding out our gifts and blessing but we stand as a mannequin, never moving, not opening the door that He is knocking at. What is it that our God, our Daddy says “test me and prove me “and see!!I didn’t get the chance to learn in school to take tests. I think it would be good to do .If we don’t test how will we know where we need improvement? PSALM 26:2 Examine me, O Lord, and prove me: test my heart and my mind. Psalm 66:10 For you, O God, have tested us; you have refined us as silver is refined. Romans 5:3-4 And not only that, but we also glory in tribulations, knowing that tribulation produces perseverance; and perseverance, character; and character, HOPE The lessons I tried to teach, yet learned instead. *Keep your door (heart) always ready to be open. *Never teach what you won’t learn *God is always standing in front of us, holding out what we need .Will we take it? For the questions that come in from the blog, or the emails, friends or family I thank you for the comments .I want to teach or learn. I know now, I don’t need to be the mannequin. God gave me all that is His!! JUST RECEIVE What is it God, Daddy, Father, Jesus is saying to you? Is the test in front of you to hard? Will you be willing to find who God is to you? Will you take the test…? Be ready, to receive What is Your Test?

Treasure Boxes

Today as I asked of my daddy,what are you saying to me? He wanted me to speak with Him so I could hear what he was saying to me. Then to share the words with others? It is an honour and a great joy when we spend time with God. We may think it is strange to hear those words. And believe me I get that! I was not able to accept people telling me Jesus was their daddy.It hurt me as I did not have the chance to know a daddy ,that was one that loved protected and shared with so for me it caused many emotions. 

So It will be easier for me to tell you  about the different treasure boxes then for me to google boxes, and then cut and paste the pictures  and whatever else is involved in the process . I want you to see today , see with your own eyes. Theses boxes have meaning there  is a very old one, torn and hardly held together its a medium size box, one that many people used before. The next is a brand new bright beautiful one,with jewels and glitter the size is just perfect for your needs.

Today God (daddy) is saying little one, no matter your age  that you are ARE HIS little one . When you were a child sometime in your life you had a special place (box) you took your dreams, your hopes your secret words knowing hoping one day they will come to pass . May I tell you today the words daddy says to you is ..

Open your box, (heart) go and look at the dreams that you dreamed. Go open your heart and believe as you did when you placed those desires  there.They were not a mistake, they came from a pure place that had the faith and trust to know one day , they will come . As a child is it easy for us to use our imagination and see things as they all ready happened. When we become older we let the fears and worries the doubts that life presses us further and further from what is ours.Today if you trust the dream maker, the Father says live your dreams !!

You are the same one that dreamed the dreams from the beginning and placed them in your box .Now live them. There is no reason you can’t.Jesus said we have not because we ask not.  You may need to let the child become alive in you once again .You have asked NOW receive!! Laughing , loving, dreaming living your blessed  life.You have created the dream , NOW is the day to start living it . IT IS YOURS. 

May I tell you a few things I buried in my box as a child? I ALWAYS wanted people to love one another, to be friendly,kind, sharing,KNOWING Jesus as their special friend.Then no one would hurt one another and we could be happy forgiving, worshiping,and  loving. As a child I buried these dreams in my heart and did my best to live them through the hurts and pain with confusion. Why as a child did I see and tried to live that way,the adults did not.Now as I learned to truly trust Jesus letting HIM be my daddy, I can forgive the words people speak and I FULLY KNOW I HAVE MANY BLESSINGS. I knew at a young age I would be different from others I needed to protect all that was mine.So I told the little girl in me be strong, don’t be afraid because some way some how, God and you will look at the scares, hurt and everything that was wrong and they will be turned around !! You wont be  unloved you wont be rejected .JESUS SAID HE  WILL USE ME TO REACH OTHERS.I will take the things that  were broken in you I will use you  if YOU LET ME. I WANT EACH OF YOU READING THESE WORDS TO KNOW GOD (MY DADDY’S) LOVE SHINES THROUGH IN ALL TREASURE BOXES! Never forgotten.No matter how your box (heart) looks or felt when you placed those desires there,trust God when He says He’s got them!

Will you open your box today ….

Will you share? Your dream may be what helps other dream theirs….




Thank you for opening your treasure box. I expect to hear and see  the great dreams of yours to begin now .




Noun: A feeling of self-consciousness,shame or awkwardness.

Synonyms:mortification,humiliation,shame,shamefacedness, chagrin discomfort,distress.

Nelson’s Illustrated Bible Dictionary,gives this definition:SHAME-A negative emotion caused by an awareness of wrongdoing,hurt ego,or guilt.Shame may also by a hurt reputation embarrassment whether or not this feeling is due to sin.PSALM 25:2-3 Proverbs 19:26;Romans 1:16

She has been opened to the world of drugs, she cannot focus on school or anything else, the years have become a life time. She is not allowed to have friends and still it’s ok with her, for all these things have become her fault. There is no reality inside of her. She is living in her own world. Her step-father has managed to place mom in the mental ward, and surely he can do as he wants.

She can’t stand to look at herself. She so wants to find life, this surely cannot be it? She begins to way out her choices. Can she do it all alone? Will any one care if she is gone? Will any one even notice? Can she take more beatings? Can she have him come into her room one more night? The choice is made, she will run away! She will show every one that she is different, that she is worth it. She does and will make a difference.
She is and will be in control of her own life from now on. To the big city of Omaha Nebraska, she feels far enough but not too far. She is only 15 years old, yet has been though more than most adults. Just as footsteps touch the ground, her life will go into a world that was never in her dreams, but they will become her nightmares! So strong and yet so real. This little girl has now become a young teenage (do you see her)?

To her at first it was like she was Cinderella. She sees a strong, good-looking man who is now paying attention to her and he appears to care about the words she speaks. He tells her how beautiful she is, and he will offer her some drugs and a place to stay until she decides what she wants to do. He even tells her he has a job if she wants it. He lets her know they will need to go to Chicago, since he was only in this city Omaha on a vacation. She will take just a short time to decide, no one cares about her, so she will prove she is different, she will prove herself. She’ll show them! As she hitchhikes with this man she wonders, what kind of job can she do? She has but an 8th grade education. Maybe she will get a job as a waitress, maybe she will go back to school, she wants to learn but no one believes she could nor did they care if she will or not. If there was to be a change she will have to do it now. The journey of our little one will put her deeper into her own prison she has already begun for herself years ago. She was unaware that she has hid herself there from the beginning of her days, until 2011 at age 51, it’s there she will allow herself to step out.

Its night-time as the semi pulls into Chicago. The buildings are so large, look at the lights! Her heart beats faster than she has ever felt. A moment comes to her. What did she do! Will anyone see she’s missing? She thinks, be strong, don’t be afraid, stand strong. This is what she has trained herself to feel. Don’t Feel.